self love

Self Love Challenges

One of the things I see most often with my private clients is how challenging it is for them to receive.  As empaths and sensitives, I believe that a huge part of this is due to the traumas we experienced.  Many of us were conditioned that the only safety was in making sure everyone else was okay.  Whether the traumas were of an actual physical nature or an emotional nature, we were often told that our needs and emotions didn’t matter.

As a business owner, if you are not honoring your needs you can wind up with a host of issues – resentment, burnout, or worse.  In addition, you may find that whatever success you might be having isn’t sustainable.

Finding a way to love and accept all parts of ourselves is the ticket to a deeply joyous life.  In living a life filled with joy, you start to call in the ideal clients.

What does that mean for you?

As you read through this article, what are you noticing?  How does the practice of self love fit into your life?  Do you believe that it’s selfish to carve out time for yourself?  What are the messages you were given as a child?  What did you see modelled in your house?  Take a few minutes to think about this.  Notice what your body has to say about this. Is there tightening or tingling anywhere?

When my daughter was young and I was trying to parent and to run a business at the same time, I found myself continually struggling with trying to give from an empty cup.  Everything felt so overwhelming.  My nervous system was constantly dysregulated which meant I was not the parent or the partner I wanted to be.

Getting to Know Yourself

There were many moments of beating myself up and telling myself to get it together.  What was wrong with me?

Have you had these moments?

What shifted things dramatically for me was when I began to work with a coach and use EFT Tapping so that I was getting the support and encouragement to really start loving myself.  It was a huge step to acknowledge that I needed that support.  Having experienced trauma as a child, much of my attachment style was of an independent nature.  It was safest just to do it myself.  That program was running deep within me, and although it might have served me well as a child, it was not serving me as an adult woman running a business.

Self Love Reflection

Regardless of where you are in your life or how you view self-love, I invite you to take a few moments and really get connected to the ideas and blocks that you have around the words and energy of self-love.  Take a few minutes – perhaps with your favorite journal. Ask yourself these questions and try to stay with your breath in the stillness to see what answers come up.

  • What does self-love mean to me?
  • How do I practice self-love in my life?
  • Am I compassionate with myself in the same way I am with friends?
  • Do I honor my needs even when they aren’t the popular choice?
  • Do I respect my intuition?
  • Am I fueling my body with the things that I know make me feel good and satiated?
  • Am I treating my health and wellness as a priority?
  • What 3 things can I do (no excuses) to bring a little more self-love into my life?

Some of these questions may resonate more than others and for each of us there will be different triggers.

Take your time and work with what feels appropriate for you.  No answer is incorrect or correct.  They are all just helping you understand yourself better.

Be gentle with yourself – especially if this feels too intense or too big to address by yourself.

 

Schedule it

If after doing this exercise you know you would be better served with some support – use this link to book a chat.

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